Latest Articles

Green and Whitesands to Become a Normal Place

Yesterday afternoon the flood defence scheme was approved during a full meeting of the Council in which 23 councillors voted for the project while 19 voted against it. There are important lessons to...

Crucial Vote on the Whitesands Flood Defences This Week

The week is upon us. On Thursday there will be a meeting of the full Council and on the agenda, the last chance to get flood defences for the Whitesands funded (mostly by the Scottish government). If...

Escaped golfer apprehended after struggle with a mobility scooter

07 Dec, 2025
The Hamester
Hame Truths

Shocked residents of Summerhill were today supporting each other after terrified residents we forced to hide behind curtains awaiting the arrival of the SSPCA's Golf Division. The incident began on...

Ayeman Toofaan - In conversation with

04 Dec, 2025
The Hamester
Hame Truths

A dinnae get it, ya'ani. So yer tellin me that every year, roon aboot the same time, this river floods aw the road an shops an hooses. It even gans up the vennel a bit. An this happens every year?...

The Leid’s Official

Happy St Andrew’s day beloved pee-wits. The Scottish Languages Act 2025 - legislation that officially recognises Gaelic and Scots as Scotland's official languages - comes into effect today. The Bill...

Shining a light on the big lights switch-on

Awwwwwww nawwwwwwwwww. I’ve hud tae flit again. All I did wis post a TikTok in front of the Mid Steeple at the big Christmas light switch on saying, “I can’t believe I live just opposite here in the...

Gies a fiver

-- Bill! Bill! Haud oan a minute. -- Whit? -- Can ye lend me a fiver, pal? -- Naw. Naw a cannae. —- Aww, come oan. I’ll gie yit back the morra. -- It’s not that Gladys. Ah cannae. I've nae money. --...

Damn you Val, give up this feud!.

Awwwwwww nawwwwwwwwww. I’ve hud tae flit again. All I did wis post a reel saying that I’m really looking forward tae the match between Raith Rovers and Queen of the South at Palmerston, at 6pm this...

How old is old enough to let go?

It’s a curious thing. We hold on to any building from the Victorian or Georgian era as if it were a precious newborn. Yet the Victorians themselves voraciously demolished buildings and monuments to...

Columbus and the journey to opposite land.

It was Columbus day across the pond a couple of weeks ago. In recent years there have been moves to celebrate the indigenous people of the US alongside or in place of famous immigrant, Christopher...

Dubai chocolate basque cheesecake debacle.

Awwwwwww nawwwwwwwwww. I’ve hud tae flit again. All I did wis post a photo of my Dubai chocolate basque cheesecake next to a letter with my address on it!

How's your muffin buttered?

~ Hello Hamester, do come in. What embarrassing ailments are we looking at today? ~ Well doctor, it's my .. ~ Just a minute. I need you to sit over there on the chaise longue. ~ Over there? ~ Yup....

You've Got A Friend Indeed

There’s been quite the debacle across the pond in old New York. The owners of a product called, Friend, began an advertising campaign on the New York subway promoting an AI enabled pendant which you...

BBC journalist hospitalised

13 Oct, 2025
The Hamester
Hame Truths

An unnamed BBC journalist (Barney Toner) was found exhausted, pacing around Cresswell repeating the phrase, "You don’t expect it to happen in a place like this. He was a quiet man, kept himself to...

Christmas Appeal 2025

01 Oct, 2025
The Hamester
Hame Truths

We've aw seen it an look't awa; airtists that hing their works aw skewwhiff. It's a miserable sicht. At this time of year, please spare a thought fir aw they angularlly challenged paintings o birdies...