The Doonhamer

Beware of cynicism dressed up as wisdom

Vol. III · Est. 2023 · Price: 5½p where sold

Letter From Amisfield

Ahoy there Orbán

By Teri Casiokola · AMISFIELD, 18th March 2026

Six weeks after a short parade of world leaders clung to Trump’s hand desperately trying to get their money’s worth at the ratification of the Board of Peace, six of those members - seven if you include the US - were involved in a shooting war with Iran. Not an arms length war, but a “holy shit is that an air raid siren” kinda war; the kind where things fall out the sky on your cities when you’re in your bed.

Now, in the latest developments, Trump has called upon allies to support his illegal war with naval assets. Europe replied, “Oh you mean us?” and then politely declined. America’s shoeshine boy in Europe, Viktor Orbán, leader of landlocked and navy-less Hungary kept his mouth shut this one time.

Fear not me hearties!! Trump’s genius war plans won’t run aground His next move will be to call naval support from the other great seafaring members of the board of peace such as Armenia, Azerbaijan, Belarus, Kazakhstan, Kosovo, Mongolia and Uzbekistan.

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